Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Well, it's been quite awhile isn't it?

" I pray for strength "

Miss me? To be honest, I haven't been updating my blog for quite some time, for the previous period of time I didn't have any idea on what to write and kept myself occupied with work and reading my favourite romance fictions. Ooooh, have i mentioned to you that I love reading? I enjoy keeping myself occupied with a book to dwell myself into. My boyfriend would sometimes complain, because i'd sometimes ignore him and read my book without even realising it. I'm sorry syg!

But hey, keep reading my blog because I will try my best to keep updating!

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Surviving the Breakup Season: How to Mend Your Broken Heart

In late December, we are not only in the midst of the holiday season; we are in the middle of the "breakup season." According to research, more breakups occur at this time than at any other time of year.

Maybe it's the stress that the holidays can put on us, or maybe it's because your boyfriend gave you fruitcake instead of the silver necklace you wanted for Christmas. Whatever the reason, you're hurting and you want it to stop. Here's how to mend your broken heart.


Don't Get Down on Yourself
After a breakup, people tend to plummet into a pit of low self-esteem and guilt. You are looking for reasons why the relationship ended, and you start obsessing and blaming yourself. "Maybe I was too hard on her for canceling dinner with my parents" or "Maybe I shouldn't have yelled at him when he came home late without calling."
This kind of negative thinking spirals out of control quickly. You may start feeling you're not attractive enough or funny enough or just plain good enough to be with that person, which isn't true. Sit down. Take a breath. And STOP this negative thinking right now! This isn't to say that you shouldn't reflect on your role in the relationship. Just be kinder to yourself!

Forget About Being Friends
Anything that has the word "friend" in it, forget about. "Friends with benefits," "Just friends" -- just say "No."
It's hard to move on when you are still keeping one foot in the past. It's time to rely on your other friends for support and get out there and make new friends. You won't be as quick to accept an invite to a party or call an old high school friend if you are busy with your ex.

Stop Thinking They're "All That"
When a relationship is over, it's easier to think of the good times as opposed to the bad times. The annoying habits and bad character traits seem to recede into the background. All you can think about is the great chemistry and the fun Saturday nights you had going out to your fave Italian restaurant together.
What you're doing is idealizing the relationship now that it's gone. You're turning it into some blockbuster movie romance when at best it was a B movie with mixed reviews. Start looking at it with more objectivity. Remind yourself of the fights you had and the frustration you felt.

Start Dating Again
Post breakup, some people might advise you to work on yourself and forget about the dating scene for a while. And if that's what you feel like doing, no problem. However, this isn't good for everyone and there is nothing wrong with getting back out there sooner rather than later.
Emailing a person you met online or going on a dinner date may be just the thing you need to lift your spirits. Of course, this doesn't mean you should dive into anything right away either. Start by getting your feet wet.

Never Lose Hope
When you are hurting after a breakup, it's easy to tell yourself, "I'll never meet anyone this fabulous again" or "I'll never find anyone." But the reality is, you WILL meet someone and, eventually, you will wind up in a better relationship. If this one was healthy and meant to be, you wouldn't be broken up. If you maintain hope and don't give into the hurt, you can pursue and find what you are looking for.

Ugh, It's Another Valentine's Day and I'm Still Single

Chapter 11 : 9 empowering things you can do to tone down that "ugh" feeling.

So, you are not in a relationship at the moment and Valentine's Day seems to be putting a big red spotlight on your singleness. Here are some practical and empowering things you can do to tone down that "ugh" feeling.


1. Wallow, But Just a Little
It's important to acknowledge your real feelings, so give yourself permission to wallow a little bit if you're feeling extra sad or lonely. The key words here are "a little bit." Don't allow yourself to dwell or obsess. Confine your wallowing to a certain time period -- say, 15 minutes of self-pity and that's it.

2. Watch "Love Actually"
The movie "Love Actually" (rated R) is great cinematherapy for V-Day because it shows that romantic love is important, but other kinds of love are just as important, such as the love of family and friends. Don't let Valentine's Day be co-opted by couples. Send valentines to all the people you love in your life!

3. Go on a Trip
A new trend for singles is to elude Valentine's Day by taking a short getaway with friends to a place where they are not constantly bombarded with images of hearts and cupids. There is nothing wrong with this trend as long as you are using it as a fun escapade, rather than an escape.

4. Re-energize Your Relationship Search
If you are feeling down at this time of year, channel your negative energy into something positive. Have you been browsing online profiles but never send an email? Have you been using work as an excuse that you are too busy to meet people? Have you been dating the wrong types of men or women for you? Use Valentine's Day as a new start to self-reflect and be proactive.

5. Ask Someone Out
If you really want a date for Valentine's Day, don't wait to be asked -- go ahead and do the asking. Even if it's someone you think of as "just a friend," you'll still have fun going out and celebrating.

6. Cuddle Up to Something Warm and Fuzzy
Warm fuzzies just make you feel good. Those V-day stuffed animals are great. So are warm cozy blankets and floppy slippers. Many would agree that the best warm fuzzies are pets. If you have a pet, get him or her a Valentine's Day treat. If you don't, maybe it's time to consider a dog or cat... now that's unconditional love!

7. Eat Some Dark Chocolate
Dark chocolate is good for our hearts in more ways than one. Besides containing potent antioxidants, it has the power to boost endorphins, the "happy juice" in our brains. The higher the percentage of cacao, the better. On Valentine's Day get your friends together for a chocolate tasting -- including chocolate fondue. Enjoy in moderation!

8. Don't See the World as One Big Happy Couple
"I see happy couples!" And that's all many single people see around V-Day. But it's a trick your mind is playing on you because that's what you are focused on. Not everyone is in a relationship and, certainly, not everyone is in a happy relationship. Keep your focus on the millions of single people out there just like you!

9. Remember This Is Just ONE Valentine's Day
Maybe you've been single for one V-day. Maybe you've been single for ten. Don't get completely discouraged and project into the future that you are going to be single for every Valentine's Day to come. No one has a crystal ball and life has a way of surprising us. Help make a good surprise more likely by keeping a positive attitude and being persistent about finding the healthy, happy relationship you want.

I can't be what i used to be

Chapter 10 : I believe that believing we survive is what makes us survive.

No one in this world is perfect nor strong enough, unless they're Superman. Still, Superman has a weakness too, right? Remember the green Krypton stone? Haha yes, that's his weakness. Why am i telling you about Superman anyway? He doesn't even exist, haha. We, as human beings make mistakes everytime, we experience 'regret' every bump in our lives. But it's okay, we still survive.

I'm an optimist, seriously. I think i have always been an optimist, i like to believe in the good and hoping that the 'good' will come true. To be honest, some of it do come true. If we believe hard enough, it's not impossible to happen.

Every once and then, you will meet up with an ugly road but all you can do is just drive over that road and finally you'll see a 'better-looking' road. So, the point is we move on. No matter how hard it could possibly be, we still move on. Thats what we should do, get over it and move on.

And moving on, sometimes we need a little shoulder to cry on and maybe, something or someone that could make us feel better.

Sunday, February 3, 2008

This is how i feel

Rihanna - Cry


I'm not the type to get my heart broken
I'm not the type to get upset and cry
Cause I never leave my heart open
Never hurts me to say goodbye
Relationships don't get deep to me
Never got that whole in love thing
And someone can say they love me truly
But at the time it didn't mean a thing

My mind is gone, I'm spinning round
And deep inside, my tears I'll drown
I'm losing grip, what's happening
I strayed from love, this is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm in this condition
And I've got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

Did it happen when we first kissed
Cause it's hurting me to let it go
Maybe cause we spent so much time
And I know that it's no more
I shoulda never let you hold me baby
Maybe why I'm sad to see us apart
I didn't give IT to you on purpose
Can't figure out how you stole my heart

My mind is gone, I'm spinning round
And deep inside, my tears I'll drown
I'm losing grip, what's happening
I strayed from love, this is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm in this condition
And I've got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

How did I get here with you, I'll never know
I never meant to let it get so personal
And After all I tried to do to stay away from love with you
I'm broken hearted, I can't let you know
And I won't let it show
You won't see me cry

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm in this condition
And I've got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I'm in this condition
And I've got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

All my life...

Thursday, January 31, 2008

We go through ups and downs, but hey that's life right?

Chapter 9 : It hurts but it may be the only way.

Some days, the whole world seems upside down. And then somehow, and probably, and when you least expect it, the world rights itself again.
And fear means I have something to lose, right? And I don't want to lose you.

I think it's better to have someone, even if it hurts, even if it is the most painful thing you have done, even if it's the most painful thing you've ever had to do. I think it's better to have someone.

We go into medicine because we want to save lives. We go into medicine because we want to do good. We go into medicine for the rush... for the high... for the ride. But, what we remember at the end of most days are the losses. What we lay awake at night replaying is the pain we caused or failed to cure. The lives we ruined or failed to save. So the experience of practicing medicine rarely resembles the goal. The experience too often is ass backwards and upside down.

There’s a clarity thing when you cross over the edge. There’s a moment when everything just melts away and you’re fearless.

"Deep down, everyone wants to believe they can be hardcore. But being hardcore isn’t just about being tough. It’s about acceptance. Sometimes you have to give yourself permission to not be hardcore for once. You don’t have to be tough every minute of every day. It’s okay to let down your guard. In fact there are moments when it’s the best thing you can possibly do… as long as you choose your moments wisely."

It isn't just surgeons. I don't know anyone who isn't haunted by something or someone. And whether we try to slice the pain away with a scalpel or shove it in the back of a closet ... our efforts usually fail. So the only way we can clear out the cobwebs is to turn a new page or put an old story to rest.... finally, finally to rest.

Forgive and forget. That’s what they say. It’s good advice, but it’s not very practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them back. When someone wrongs us, we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores are never settled… old wounds never heal. And the most we can hope for, is that one day we’ll be lucky enough to forget.

In life, only one thing is certain, apart from death and taxes. No matter how hard you try, no matter how good your intentions, you are going to make mistakes. You’re going to hurt people. You’re going to get hurt.

The truth is painful. Deep down, nobody wants to hear it, especially when it hits close to home. Sometimes we tell the truth because the truth is all we have to give. Sometimes we tell the truth because we need to say it out loud to hear it for ourselves. And sometimes we tell the truth because we just can't help ourselves. Sometimes, we tell them because we owe them at least that much.

Still, they say you don’t kick the habit until you hit rock bottom, but how do you know when you’re there? Because no matter how badly a thing is hurting us, sometimes letting it go hurts even worse.


Change; we don’t like it, we fear it, but we can't stop it from coming. We either adapt to change or we get left behind. And it hurts to grow, anybody who tells you it doesn’t is lying. But heres the truth: the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes change is good. Oh, sometimes, change is ... everything.

Too often, the thing you want most is the one thing you can't have. Desire leaves us heartbroken, it wears us out. Desire can wreck your life. But as tough as wanting something can be. The people who suffer the most, are those who don't know what they want.

People have scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret roadmaps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.

Chapter 8 : Five Friends Every Woman Should Have.

1. The Uplifter. This woman's favorite word: yes. You could tell her you're trading your six-figure income for a career in offtrack betting, and she'd barely pause before yelping "Go for it!" Don't you need someone who looks past the love handles to notice the extraordinarily gorgeous you?

2. The Travel Buddy. When the hotel in St. Lucia is a bust, one characteristic becomes all-important: flexibility. This agreeable companion need not be the girl you traded pinkie swears with on the playground; it's enough that she's comfortable with quiet (between gabfests) and is a teensy bit mischievous (as in tequila after midnight).

3. The Truth Teller Intent is what separates the constructive from the abusive. Once you've established that the hard news is spoken in love (not in jealousy or malice), you'd be smart to seek out this woman's perspective.

4. The Girl Who Just Wants to Have Fun. One Saturday a pal and I—and yes, we're both over age 12—pored over every glitter lip gloss in a drugstore aisle for an entire 45 minutes. Forget the crisis download (for that, see the Uplifter); this partnership is about spontaneous good times.

5. The Unlikely Friend. "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anaïs Nin wrote. My friends—some twice my age, others half, some rich, others homeless, some black like me, others Korean, Mexican, Caucasian—have added richness to my life that only variety can bring.